In which I concede defeat to Nick Jonas, and Japanese Eponines are better than the English ones...

For those of you who know me well-enough to hear my real-life exploits, I recently went to a Jonas Brothers concert. Well, it was more than a concert. It was a sound-check, a meet and greet, and a concert.

It was so much fun. And honestly, for all the negativity I had toward them prior to this concert, they aren't that bad. I believe a lot of the negativity toward them is more centered toward their alignment with Disney.

They can't change this, however. And honestly, I don't think they should. Because, as we've all seen, bad things happen to people who start with Disney, and then try to leave. The only exception of this rule, I think is Justin Timberlake. And Nick Jonas, who has a solid career on Broadway and another band. Or at least, I think it's another band. The Administration I think is also his, or he's a part of it because he has a twitter for news for The Administration. [/I am not a freaky stalker]

Okay. Now that I put that disclaimer, I now have to quote the first thing that popped into my head when I wrote that. "I AM NOT A FREAKY FISH GUY!"

Obscure reference out of the way. Back to Disney.

So. My theory that people who try to leave Disney are kinda sorta screwed. Exhibits A-C: Brittney Spears, Christina Agulera (or however the fuck you spell her last name), and Lindsey Lohan.

Exhibit A: Was a former Mousketer (is that how you spell that?). She leaves Disney, and becomes successful for the late part of the 90s/early part of the 00s. And then shit hits the fan. We're all familiar with Brittney's exploits over the past couple of years. Need I say more?

Exhibit B: Was also a former Mouseketer (again, cbf to spell). Now, Christina is actually not that bad in terms of what happened to her, and the only thing she's having trouble with is relaunching her career. She's tried several times, and I consider every time a smashing success because I love her and a lot of the songs she puts out. Candyman? Aint No Other Man? Hurt?

Love her. But my point is, she was with Disney, and now she can't keep her music career afloat.

Exhibit C: Lindsay Lohan. Need I really say more? She went from this, a bright, innocent girl whose claim to fame was Parent Trap, a Disney movie and she was much beloved. From there, Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (is that what that movie's called or am I mixing it up with Confessions of a Shopaholic?), and Herbie: Fully Loaded. Both which were Disney movies. And yes, she did other movies, but when I think Lindsay Lohan, those are the first three I think of.

But then she turned into this. Again, Lindsay is another one whose exploits are well-known by pop culture loving America. After she tried to leave Disney.

People are starting to say that Miley Cyrus will head down this course. Miley's strings with Disney are loose at best. We will just have to see what she looks like in five years. Although...after seeing the 'Can't Be Tamed' music video, I'm worried.

Do with these facts what you will. Jonas Brothers, STAY THE COURSE!

Now, I'm gonna go to the first part of my title for this blog post. That's right, Nick Jonas. I concede defeat. You are, in my eyes, an acceptable Marius. Actually, you're beyond acceptable.

Wait. I have to correct a mistake I made in one of my earlier blog posts. I said that the 25th Anniversary Concert CD would be made available for purchase. I mistook it for the 25th Anniversary World Tour. As far as I know (read: according to Wikipedia) there are no plans to make a 25th Anniversary Concert CD at the moment. Sorry about that.

Back to Nick Jonas. Why am I conceding defeat to Nick Jonas? Well...I have two reasons actually. The first is this. Are you done listening? Did you really expect that from Nick Jonas? I certainly didn't! As far as Marius goes, I think he's got the role down pat. He's no David Bryant, but that's because I'm biased.

So, Nick Jonas? I apologize for assuming your casting was just a publicity thing. I didn't realize you were actually talented.

The second reason is because of something I saw when I met him in person at the meet and greet. I asked him what it was like to be in Les Miserables. And he smiled at me (it was an open mouthed smile!), and a light went on his eyes. I would just like to say that this is impressive because Nick Jonas never smiles. Somebody told me it was because he hates the way his teeth look. I feel kinda bad for the poor kid.

Anyway, I saw how much Les Miserables meant to him. It was...that look in his eyes, that pride, and that sense of accomplishment that Les Miserables was something he did without his brothers, without Disney, just him. I also think part of the reason he smiled was that I didn't ask him to marry me.

SPEAKING OF JOBROS OBSESSION. When we were at the meet and greet, the dancers from Camp Rock 2 were there, and I saw Allyson Stoner and she did the 'Mike's Super Short Show' thing and it was awesome. Also, there was this girl who was asking Frankie Jonas a question and she was actually hyperventilating and couldn't spit the words out. And Frankie just stood their with this "WTF?" look plastered all over his face. I wish I had a picture.

I do have an awesome picture of Kevin, though. It was a proud, picture-taking moment for me. Wanna see?



I have all sorts of really creepy, up close pictures of them from the sound check. I wish I had been that close during the concert, although I had a feeling I would've gone deaf. The screaming was just completely unreal.

Okay. Now to the second part of my post, which is relatively short in comparison. Now, I bet you're thinking to yourselves, "Now, why are Japanese Eponines better than the English ones"? I'll tell you.

Okay, I actually don't know. But, on Tuesday, I bought the Complete Symphonic Recording of Les Miserables, which was done in 1988, and complies some great actors and come I couldn't care less for (I'm look at you, Gary Morris and Michael Ball!), all from international productions of Les Mis that were playing at the time.

The Eponine in this particular version is some chick by the name of Kaho Shimada, who was in the Tokyo Production at some point. I don't think I'm supposed to know who that is. Now, apparently, she learned English just so she could do this recording. It doesn't show. Okay, it kinda shows, but I think she's significantly better than Frances Ruffelle from the Original Broadway Cast.

Decide for yourself.

However, my personal favorite is Lea Salonga, who was Eponine (if you do decide to watch the link, BRACE YOURSELF for the loud introduction of the barricade) in the 1995 Dream Cast Concert. You probably know her better as Mulan's singing voice. She's my favorite.

Oh yeah. As a Glee fan, I probably should count Lea Michele's rendition in there somewhere. First, I have to find a version of her that's not from Glee just because the interspersed dialogue ruins the song in my eyes.

Y'know, God Bless crazy obsessed fans that post videos on YouTube. Lea Michele is a talented actress. Just...not a talented TV actress. I can't really figure out how that makes sense, since I think stage acting is so much harder (like I'd have any experience otherwise?)...but whatever. The Emmys are on tomorrow-wait. It's Sunday. OMG THEY'RE ON TONIGHT.

Right, so Lea Michele. Umm, she's good. Like, she's really talented. See? See how talented she is? I was just about to make another reference to Yu-Gi-Oh: The Abridged Series, but where I was going...it just sounded really creepy.

Well, that's pretty much all I have to say except...VIVA LA TEAM COCO!

Have fun watching the Emmys tonight, kids! PEACE.

PS> Mia Michaels did the Emmy Award for Outstanding Choreography. Elizabeth Mitchell did not win. Rage will ensue tomorrow/later tonight.

French is a hot language.

WARNING: This post contains a lot of French.

"Pour regarder dans les yeux de la mort est enivrante".

You know what that translates to? Actually. I wanna warn you that before you read on, I was reading about "House of Leaves" today on TvTropes, and it appears to be a very frightening book, and that's where I got the above quote from. So...I'm not responsible any mental scarring.

Anyway, "Pour regarder dans les yeux de la mort est envrante" translates to "To look into the eyes of death is intoxicating". Now, to say that in English immediately comes off as scary. To say it in French?

It just sounds so pretty. French can make anything sound really pretty. Which is why, I think, Lady Gaga is obsessed with it. Yeah, that was a random segue, I know.

If you disagree with me, think about it. In the beginning of Alejandro she says, "I know that we are young, and I know that you may love me. But I just can't be with you like this anymore...Alejandro" IN A FRENCH ACCENT. Now, if you're speaking to a dude with a Hispanic name, why are you donning a French accent? Wouldn't it make more sense to say it with a hispanic accent?

No. Because it doesn't sound as pretty. Go on. Try it. I'll wait. I can't even do the Hispanic actually. It just ends up sounding like a redneck version of Speedy Gonzalez. Pathetic, I know.

And in Bad Romance, Lady Gaga says, "Je veux ton amour, et je veux ton revanche. Je veux ton amour" which according to Google Translate translates into "I want your love, and I want your hand. I want your love". Although, revanche can mean 'revenge' in French so...I'm thinking something is lost in translation here. Whatever.

Following that line, she says, "I don't wanna be friends". In a French accent. Admittedly, if she said it in an Italian accent after speaking French it would sound weird. But why doesn't she say, "Voglio il tuo amore e voglio la tua vendetta, io voglio il tuo amore" (Italian) or "Eu quero seu amor e eu quero a sua vingança, eu quero seu amor" (Portugese) or "Quiero tu amor y quiero tu venganza, Quiero tu amor" (Spanish). Because none of them sound NEARLY as good as "Je veux ton amour, et je veux ton revanche. Je veux ton amour".

Now, French may just work for Lady Gaga.

...Or does it?

Listen to this. It's Colors of the Wind in French. Here's the English version. French makes a Disney movie sound incredibly sexy. Actually, the English one's actual sound quality seems to be a lot worse on my computer, so that could just be my computer.

I will admit, the English one has Judy Kuhn going for it, who orginated the role of Cosette in Les Miserables (which, I will get to in a minute). But the French one just has a better quality of lyricality (yes, I'm going Mia Michaels up in this joint) to it. It flows better. It sounds better. It makes me want to go plant a tree. Also, it distracts one from the fact that Pocahontas doesn't have a nose.

I bet you didn't notice that before until I mentioned it. Don't worry, I didn't either until Nostalgia Chick mentioned it to me either. Go on, check. It's okay. I'll wait.

...Are you there? Okay, good! Moving on!

As not really promised, Les Miserables! Now, I really don't know where to begin with this. The book, the numerous film versions, or the musical. Let's begin with my favorite one: the musical! Les Miserables (the musical) was released in 1980 as a concept album by two French guys nobody ever heard of: Claude-Michel Schönberg and Alain Boublil. The original stage production of this concept album was held in a sports arena for three months and then closed when booking contracts expired.

In 1982, Cameron Mackintosh, most notable for producing shows like Cats and Phantom of the Opera and...well, Les Mis, was given a copy of the concept album by some guy named Farago. Farago wanted Mackintosh to make an English adaptation of the successful concept album. Mackintosh was initially reluctant, but eventually produced Les Miserables, which opened at Barbican Arts Centre on October 8th (which is also the same day Phantom of the Opera opened in Her Majesty's Theatre, one year later), 1985. Initially, it was slated to be a commercial failure, being horribly condemmed by theater critics and literary critics alike. But the public enjoyed it, and thus it thrived, steadily gaining better reviews and was eventually moved to the Queen's Theatre where it plays to this day. I wanna go see it.

So, what does this have to do with the language of the French? The entire musical.

Wait. Actually. Before I even get into that, they're doing a 25th Anniversary Concert this year. Squee. I want to find a way to watch it. However, there is one problem I have with it. Nick Jonas. As Marius. Oh, God if I didn't mock Marius's every single note as it is...this will just make it so much worse. UGGH. I know Nick Jonas played Gavroche for a spell on Broadway...but I can't imagine him singing "A Heart Full of Love" and wanting to sigh dreamily. Granted, I never did that with Michael Ball. But I was close.

However, Lea Salonga (who was at the Tarrytown Music Hall last year and I wanted to go see her SO BADLY) is the only person from the 10th Anniversary concert who will be there. Instead of Eponine, she'll now be Fantine. I...am surprisingly okay with that.

Moving on.

I will take the most notable songs from that musical and compare them to their French counterparts. The French Recordings are from the concept album (yay YouTube!). English is from the Original Broadway cast.

Do You Hear The People Sing? vs. A La Volonte Du Peuple

Actually, I think this is a tie. The French guy definitely has more passion in his voice but...I could have an affair with Michael Maguire's voice. If it was possible, I would marry that man's voice. Mmmm. I love that voice so. Additionally, the English version as opposed to the French Concept makes use of all the Barricade Boys, not just Enjolras. The French one sounds very good though.

The song I hate with a burning, fiery passion vs its French counterpart

These are very different. Like, it shocked me the first time I listened to it. I mean, the tune of the vocals isn't that much different, but the instrumentation is so much more simple. I think I like it a lot more than the original Broadway version. Additionally, I like the background singers. You have to remember that Fantine's fate was similar to many, many women at that time. She is a lost soul, but not alone, if that makes sense. The only thing I don't like is how toward the end, her voice doesn't really change all that much as the music does, in comparison to the English. Additionally, the English one has an oboe solo that the beginning. It gets points just for that. But the French one is still better. Point to the French.

The Lea Michele Song vs The Song with a Boring Name in the Paris Revival

The French version is known as the 'lost' song of Eponine, as it didn't make it very far past the concept album, although you can hear part of the song in 'A Little Fall of Rain'. I like the French version better. I mean...it sounds more mournful instead of bitter. The problem with Eponine is that she was never meant to be a potential romantic interest for Marius. I'm looking at you, fanbrats.

In the book, she tricks Marius into going to the Barricades, convinced that he will die. She ends up taking a bullet for him, saying that "she wanted to die first". Although, it is argued that she also took the bullet for him selflessly, which can be construed...the point is, in the book she's a butterface that is supposed to show the ruination of society and how quickly it can turn on people. Additionally, she's a bit loony. Point is, she's suddenly become the icon for teenagers who completely miss the point of Eponine because her song basically translates to "HE DOESN'T LOVE MEEEEE". When it's really, "SOCIETY RUINED MY LIFE AND HE DOESN'T LOVE MEEEEEE". Although, I have no idea if that's what the French version is saying. I also don't like Francis Ruffelle's voice. It sounds high pitched and annoying. Also, for those of you who are wondering why I called this the 'Lea Michele song'...you must've not seen the pilot of Glee. Point to the French.

Bring Him Home vs Comme Un Homme

Now, Comme Un Homme did NOT originally appear in the French Concept Album, but has become one of the most notable songs for Jean Valjean and in the entire musical. I blame Britain's Got Talent. Essentially, these two are the same, and really relies on your vocal preferences. I prefer Colm Wilkinson. Also, it was a pain the ass to find a recording of this because Comme Un Homme translates to "Like A Man" and is also the French version of "I'll Make A Man Out of You" from Mulan. And the version I have here is the French Canadian version because I couldn't find the actual French version. I have it on my iTunes. Just not here. Point to the English.

Castle on a Cloud vs. Mon Prince Est En Chemin

I'm guessing the lyrics are completely different. The longer instrumentation in the French version is irksome to me, but the French gets the point actually because of the revival's title "Une poupée dans la vitrine", which is a reference to a doll Cosette sees in the window of a store that Jean Valjean will later buy for her. Anything that goes back to the source material just wins. Also, if you look at the comments on the French one, people who understand it says the original song makes a bit more sense in relation to the book. Point to the French.

That song made kind of famous by the Seinfeld episode vs. God, these people are shmucks

The Seinfeld episode in question is the one where George has this song stuck in his head and something about a suede jacket and Elaine's father...I only saw the episode once. My mom would know more about this stuff than I would. I made a parody of this song about the murderers in Macbeth. It was brilliant. I pick the French version yet again. It makes Thenardier sound suaver, but still sleazy. Which, he should. But he's so much worse in the book. Hence, why I like the book better. But still, point to the French.

Empty Chairs at Empty Tables vs. Seul devant ces tables vides

Seul devant ces tables vides, surprisingly, did not appear in the original concept album, as Marius never spends much time brooding over his fallen commerades in the book (as I recall). He was too busy being unconcious, reconciling with his grandfather, shunning Jean Valjean away and then getting married to even think about that. With the exception of mentioning Eponine like once or twice. Then again, in the book, Marius isn't close with the Friends of the ABC at all. He just joins them because Eponine told him that he was desperately needed and he thought he'd never see Cosette again. Now, I say that this is surprising because this is song is considered to be Marius's song. But, it had no reason to be on the original concept album which was more book oriented. At any rate...Marius can really be sold based on his actor. I'm not looking forward to hearing Nick Jonas singing this. The album will be released August 23rd. I plan on buying it. And mocking Nick Jonas.

But back to the song. I pick the French version, again. I actually couldn't find the original Broadway version on Youtube, which distressed me. So, I picked the 10th Anniversary Edition of this song, sung by Michael Ball, who is basically the reason why I don't like Marius. Book!Marius is awesome. Michael Ball!Marius isn't. Point to the French (c'mon, you know it sounds better).

All right, last song, I promise. I'm thinking of which Javert song to pick. His overly religious song that isn't true to the book whatsoever, or his suicide song. I pick the latter! C'mon, do you wanna hear the overly religious song? No. Exactly.

Javert's Suicide vs. Le suicide de Javert

Now, Le suicide de Javert was not called that in the concept album but I (OF COURSE) couldn't find it on YouTube. The song was originally called Noir ou Blanc (Black or White). Which may sound boring in English, but it's pretty legitimate if you consider Javert's way of thinking. Now, I'm not even using the Original Broadway version of Javert's Suicide. Why? Because the 10th Anniversary version kicks some major ass. Phillip Quast. He has a cool name and he is the man. Actually, Colm Wilkinson is the man, so Phillip Quast is the dude. Now, where the English version has Phillip Quast, the French version has the confrontation between Valjean and Javert, in which Valjean pleads Javert to spare him one more hour so he can save Marius. Although, the 10th Anniversary has this too...whatever, it sounds better in French and I'm having trouble finding it at the moment. My computer is old and it hates me.

Anyway, that's how French pwns in the Les Miserables musical. For the book, I will just show you this one quote and suddenly everything will make sense. Okay, not really but there's one particular quote that sounds so much better in French than it does in English. Like I said, French is a hot language.

"Tant qu’il existera, par le fait des lois et des mœurs, une damnation sociale créant artificiellement, en pleine civilisation, des enfers, et compliquant d’une fatalité humaine la destinée qui est divine; tant que les trois problèmes du siècle, la dégradation de l’homme par le prolétariat, la déchéance de la femme par la faim, l’atrophie de l’enfant par la nuit, ne seront pas résolus; tant que, dans de certaines régions, l’asphyxie sociale sera possible; en d’autres termes, et à un point de vue plus étendu encore, tant qu’il y aura sur la terre ignorance et misère, des livres de la nature de celui-ci pourront ne pas être inutiles."

Which translates to:

"So long as there shall exist, by reason of law and custom, a social condemnation, which, in the face of civilisation, artificially creates hells on earth, and complicates a destiny that is divine, with human fatality; so long as the three problems of the age — the degradation of man by poverty, the ruin of woman by starvation, and the dwarfing of childhood by physical and spiritual night — are not solved; so long as, in certain regions, social asphyxia shall be possible; in other words, and from a yet more extended point of view, so long as ignorance and misery remain on earth, books like this cannot be useless."

Actually, it sounds really good in both languages, but I imagine in French it flows better, as French was Hugo's native language. Here is the wikiquote page for Les Miserables (the book). Decide for yourself which one is better.

By the way, I'm sorry it took so long to get this to you. I burned my hand last week and then I got lyme disease...again.

I Still Haven't Decided If I'm Angry Or Not...

Warning: The following post contains a lot of bias.

As promised, OTHER Emmy nominations.

Unlike my bestest best friend in the whole wide world, I'm going into the writing and directing and other sub nominations that nobody really cares about, because it gives me a good reason to rant/rave about things.

First things first. Glee got NINETEEN EMMY NOMINATIONS. The hell? Some things are warranted. Some, not so much. But I'll get into that later. I'm gonna start nitpicking on random awards because I'm not using the fancy drop down list that you can use on the Emmy website, but the PDF file. I'm lazy.

One of the obscure awards: Outstanding Art Direction for a Single-Camera Series. I don't even know what that means, but Glee's "Pilot" up against Lost's "Ab Aeterno", which is regarded by fans and critics alike to be the second best episode in the entire series, second only to "The Constant", which ironically did not receive Emmy nominations of any kind.

It's also up against the now ended because it sucked so hard Heroes' "Brave New World" which was a stinkin' good episode for the dying series. Like, this was the episode that gave people hope for the show. Before crushing their dreams so hard.

Nominated for that category is also Modern Family's "Moon Landing", and True Blood's "Never Let Me Go". My prediction? Either True Blood or Lost. I say True Blood because it's supposed to be a very pretty show artistically, and Lost because I'm biased and we might see the "Everybody Loves Raymond" syndrome (in which Lost wins everything it's nominated for, simply because it's over) at the Emmys this year.

Right. Next category that catches my interest. Wait. Actually. Before I get into that, I'd just like to say I think it's stinkin' awesome that Conan O'Brien got nominated for some stuff this year, and Jay Leno is sitting at NBC, twiddling his thumbs. The Academy is clearly Team Coco. Like me! :D

Anyway, next award. Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series. Glee has two nominations here, neither of which I think are deserved. For the Pilot and for Wheels. The pilot was good, so I don't have much of a problem with this as I do for Wheels. Maybe it's just my extreme distaste for the musical numbers in Wheels, but there's something about that episode that kinda gets on my nerves. Don't understand the nominations at all. Whatever. I think Modern Family will win.

Next! Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series. Lost was nominated, not surprising me in the least, but the episode it got nominated for kind of did. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm not surprised anymore. The episode nominated was the series finale, appropriately titled "The End". I won't give anything away, but just thinking about the ending of that episode brings tears to my eyes and...excuse me, I need a tissue.

Okay, I'm back. Now, Dexter is also nominated for this episode, and while I haven't seen Dexter in ages because my mom got rid of Showtime (-insert angry face of choice here-), Dexter has a lot of great direction in general (yay for nonsensical posting?). I think Dexter will win for this category.

Umm, before I go on to the next category, I just would like to randomly point out that I love Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert. Sorry, it may seem random to you, but not to me because I keep seeing their names. And Coco's.

Okay. Next award. Outstanding Hairstyling for a Single-Camera series. The only reason I'm bringing this up is for the Glee episodes nominated. "The Power of Madonna" and . . . "Hairography". I got a good giggle out of that.

Random time! I hate makeup awards. Seriously, I do. I always feel like no matter what I'm watching, everybody is wearing too much eye makeup. And then, there are some shows where the actors aren't even wearing eyeliner, and it looks like they have too much eyeliner on. I'm looking at you, Nestor Carbonell.

Next award I feel like bringing up. Outstanding Music Composition for a Series (Original Dramatic Composition). We all know who will win here. The Music Man himself, Michael Giacchino. That's just not even a competition. That's just like...rape. Please, I ask you to NOT watch this clip, but just listen to the music. Or, if you've seen Up, you know what the man can do.

Oh, Hans Zimmer got nominated for Outstanding Music Composition For
A Miniseries, Movie Or A Special (Original Dramatic Score). Against a bunch of dudes (and maybe a lady) that I've never heard of. I'm taking an Arrested Development joke about who I think will win: "It's like comparing an apple, and some fruit that nobody's ever heard of." Yeah. If you don't know who Hans Zimmer is right away, you've definitely heard stuff he's done. Case in point? Pirates of the Carribean 2 and 3. He also composed stuff for the Dark Knight with James Newton Howard (who composed for Titanic). So...yeah, moving on.

Outstanding Original Music And Lyrics...this is an award? Wait, seriously, this is an award? I know they did this at the Oscars and stuff, but...seriously? Ehh, whatever. I'm not going into this. It just caught my attention.

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Comedy Series. Matthew Morrison. I don't get it. I really don't. I don't think he's a fantastic actor most of the time. If they show clips this year, for what moment they got nominated for, I really hope it's that moment where Will blows up at Terri. Because that was a great moment acting wise. Alec Baldwin and Steve Carrell are also nominated. Who will win the award? "'Not I!' said Steve Carrell". That's right. Every actor in this category is just Alec Baldwin's bitch. He better win. Inexpressible rage will ensue if he doesn't.

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series. You've got a good running here. Matthew Fox, Michael C. Hall, Kyle Chandler, Hugh Laurie, Bryan Cranston, and Jon Hamm. Okay, so I've never heard of the last two, but...it's still a good category, damn it. My choice to win? Michael C. Hall. Because Michael C. Hall is love. Murderous, pyschopathic love. Now, I love Matthew Fox, don't get me wrong. I once woke up to the sound of his voice and it was one of the most glorious things I've ever woken up to. But...he kinda sucks. He does. Everybody spent YEARS complaining about Jack. Frankly, I think Naveen Andrews should've been nominated. But whatever.

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Miniseries Or A Movie. This is a FANTASTIC category. Jeff Bridges, Martin Sheen, Sir Ian McKellen, Dennis Quaid (okay, he's not that great), and Al Pacino. Please. Take your pick out of this category. With the exception of Dennis Quaid (I don't see the appeal! He was tolerable in Parent Trap), they're all fine actors.

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Comedy Series. Lea Michele. Oh, GOD how this irks me. And I don't know if this is my extreme dislike of Rachel Berry and my inability to separate the two, but I don't think that she's a good actor. At all. She doesn't make her character likable at all and just...arrrggh this nomination frustrates me so. Tiny Fey, please beat her. That is all. Or Toni Collette. Basically anyone that ISN'T Lea Michele should win.

Random time! January Jones is a cool name. HEY! Connie Briton! Long time no see! Mariska Hargitay! Damages is still on television? Whatever.

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series. Chris Colfer? I love you. Jon Cryer? I immensely dislike you. You irk me in ways I didn't think it was possible for a person to be irked. Omg. It's NPH. -insert all sorts of squeeing here-

All right. Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series. Oh whoa, I just noticed I keep switching capitalization. I don't know why I do that. Anyway. Michael Emerson and Terry O'Quinn. They've each won it once for this show (Lost). Michael Emerson has been nominated more times, but the last time these two were up against each other, Terry O'Quinn came out as the victor. Do I really think anyone else will win in this category? No. But I'm extremely biased. Oh, Andre Braugher got nominated. That's a name I haven't seen anywhere in a long time.

Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series: Jane Lynch. That is all.

Outstanding Guest Actor In A Comedy Series: NPH (Bryan Ryan on Glee), Will Arnett (Devin Banks on 30 Rock), and Mike O'Malley (Burt Hummel on Glee). Two well deserved nominations for Glee right here. And a very much deserved nomination for Will Arnett right here. I can't pick who will win out of the three of them. My guess would be Mike O'Malley. Any scene between him and Chris Colfer is just...there are no words.

Outstanding Guest Actress In A Comedy Series: Kristen Chenowith, Jane Lynch (for Two and a Half Men), Betty White, Tina Fey...this is a great category. I'd be content with anyone winning. Preferibly Cheno, but we can't always get what we want.

Outstanding Guest Actress In A Drama Series: This is where Elizabeth Mitchell gets her nomination that she SHOULD'VE gotten last year for her work on Lost. Looking up her film credits, I now know that she played a character named Blair in a movie I've never heard of. I now feel ten times cooler. But also nominated are Sissy Spacek, Shirley Jones, and Lily Tomlin who I've heard were stellar in their respective performances. I'mma go see what Entertainment Weekly says about all of this later.

Outstanding Host For A Reality Or Reality-Competition Program. I hate this category. Because two hosts who deserved to be nominated never are. Cat Deely from So You Think You Can Dance (she had a barbeque on the 4th of July in which present and past contestants were invited! That's classy), and Padma Lakshmi from Top Chef (who is a class act in general). Heidi Klum is endearing, as is Ryan Seacrest and Tom Beregon, and the latter is only on occassion. I hate this category. So much.

All right. I'm done. I really can't look at this PDF file anymore. I'm tired. Plus, we're getting into categories I can't be fucked to give a damn about. Oh! The episode of Friday Night Lights that my bestest best friend was raving about got a writing nod. How 'bout that?

One last thing: Anne Hathaway got an Emmy nomination for "Oustanding Voice-Over Performance" for that Simpsons episode she was in...and I remember thinking to myself when I watched it, "THAT'S Anne Hathaway? It sounds nothing like her!" Perhaps that's what's so outsanding about it? I like Anne Hathaway's voice though...:/

So, overall? I'm meh about these nominations. We'll see what happens on the night of the Emmys.

Then Where Would You Be, Miss Rachel Berry?

A Glee post. Yup. I'm already at this point. Let's face it: season's over. I now have to deal with the fact that YET AGAIN, I have nothing to watch on Tuesday nights now that Lost is over for good. Oh, God. Lost. How I'm going to miss that show. But another post for another day!

So...Glee.

What do I like about Glee, exactly? That's a damn good question. Glee is known to be one of the sure-fire ways to get me to cheer up when I'm down. But I find myself questioning a lot of the plotlines and characters. Some of the musical numbers and episodes just make me flat out roll my eyes.

So then why am I listening to 'Kurt's Turn' as I'm typing this up? Well, frankly, that's because Chris Colfer's rendition kicks the crap out of a few performers who have done this. If I had to rank Rose's/Kurt's Turn (of the ones I've heard), it'd be something like this. Actually, wait, before I do that, let me set up the scene from the show that leads up to this song. Rose is a mother who just wants her daughter June to be famous. They have a manager, Herbie. He takes advantage them a lot (I think). June has just told her mother that she plans to run away and elope with this random guy whose name I forgot. The manager constantly takes advantage of Rose. And Rose has had enough. Who pulls it off the best? Well:

Ethel Merman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rv1p1Vea0iY&feature=fvw)
Liza Minnelli (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9_8Av7OCVw&feature=related)
Patti LuPone (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYsnwawyHrc&feature=related)
Chris Colfer (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hrr6LIIPGS8)
Bernadette Peters (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_eD1btsIAE&feature=related)
Bette Midler (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLbToMyrpvo&feature=related)

Feel free to disagree.

Sorry, Ms. Peters. You're still my favorite out of the bunch. Okay. Second favorite. Liza wins for being on Arrested Development. Okay. Third favorite. I love Chris Colfer. But y'know, Rogers and Hammerstein's Cinderella. I haven't forgotten the days where I used to walk around my house, and my seven-year-old self would be singing 'Impossible'. Mainly because I still walk around my house singing Broadway musicals.

And there we go. I think that's the reason I liked Glee so much. They do a lot of stuff from musicals on Glee. And even when they don't, it's a lot of bursting into song at random moments. I do that all the stinkin' time. People get annoyed at me (understandably) for it. Actually, it's not even musicals that I burst out into. I burst out into every single song that I can. Like today, I was totes rocking Your Love is My Drug by Ke$ha. Although, I like songs from musicals a lot better. It's just how it is.

Anyway. Take a look at all the musicals that have been sung on the show:

Oliver!
Les Miserables (oh dear God, how I am SICK of 'I Dreamed a Dream')
Chicago
Guys and Dolls
Grease
West Side Story
Cabaret
My Fair Lady
Wicked
Funny Girl
The Jazz Singer
A Chorus Line
The Wiz
Sweet Charity


The sad thing is? With the exception of Oliver!, Funny Girl, and The Jazz Singer, I can name and sing other songs from all of those musicals. In the cases of Les Mis, Chicago, West Side Story, Cabaret and Wicked, I can sing the whole damn musical without a problem.

But for the other songs, here's what I can came. You ready for this?

Guys and Dolls- Luck Be A Lady
Grease- Beauty School Dropout (that's not my go-to Grease song, but the one that first popped into my head. Also, I have yet to see Grease and I know a lot of songs from that movie/musical)
My Fair Lady- The Rain In Spain (everybody knows this song, whether they realize it or not)
A Chorus Line- One (if you knew my mother, you would know this song too)
The Wiz- A Brand New Day (SYTYCD, kids)
Sweet Charity- Rhythm of Life (oh dear zombie Jesus. This song. I hate this song with a burning passion)


Yeah. I'm sure if Rachel Berry and I would be pretty good friends with our extensive knowledge/obsession with everything Broadway. She may not like me so much because I'm sick of 'I Dreamed a Dream'. Not for nothing, my Les Mis obsession started around the time Susan Boyle became really popular.

But I've heard every version of I've Dreamed a Dream in existence. My favorite? Tenth Anniversary Concert Edition. Ruthie Henshall, kids. That's why a show like Glee was made for someone like me. It's not HEALTHY to know this much about Broadway musicals and music in general. I took AP Music Theory this year (great class, btdubs). I think I smile when I watch it because taking place in a high school (though NONE of the actors are high schoolers themselves, and I think the youngest of them just turned twenty) and I see many relatable characters.

I personally relate the most to Quinn. Not that I'm preggo or anything (if I were, I would probably be in the same position as Quinn. My mom threatened to disown me if I ever got a tattoo. Imagine how she'd react if I got knocked up), nor have I been ever really been popular, but she's got this whole 'I'm not good enough for my parents' thing going on for her, and I get that.

Actually, I see myself in all of the characters, as weird as that sounds. Even like...Jewfro. Oh wait, that's the TWOP name for him. Jacob? That's his name, right? And Jesse St. James.

Oh, zombie Jesus. How I love Jesse St. James. I'm actually really upset that he ended up being a total douchebag after all that. And it's sad, because after my initial dislike of his hair...I have now come to love it and will miss it dearly. Because let's face it: he probably isn't coming back. Unless the fans demand it to be.

Ryan Murphy, if you're reading this (and you definitely aren't), I demand you find a way to write Jesse back into the show.

So...I should probably talk about the episodes and stuff. But I don't wanna. I really don't. Because for every one good episode, there were two bad ones, so I don't really feel like discussing that. Believe it or not though, I wasn't disappointed with Glee. Yes, some of the storylines were meh, but it never failed to at least get a smile from me. So...I can't wait for next season.

Speaking of believing...a nostalgic moment who watched the pilot over a year ago. Also, translations are below the video (I think that might become a signature thing for me):



Translations:
Arrested Development- Probably one of the best, most underrated comedies of the past decade.
Rogers and Hammerstein's Cinderella- The one with Brandy and Whitney Huston. Yup.
totes rocking- totally doing a really good job at singing
Your Love is My Drug by Ke$ha- The catchiest, dirtiest, most confusing song on the face of the planet. I think her songs are a cry for help. In fact, I think my next blog post is gonna be on the entity that is Ke$ha.
zombie Jesus- This is exactly what it sounds like. Jesus came back from the dead. Therefore he is a zombie. Term was originated on Futurama.
btdubs-By the way
preggo-pregnant